The week is finally over!

What a week it was. So much has happened. This is the part of the cancer journey I am not sure I could convey to you unless we were talking. That part when frustration, bad scheduling, and changes in the doctor's decisions make life very crazy. I believe it has calmed down now. There is much I could say, but I am going to keep this brief.

On Friday the 15th, I was at the CTCA all scheduled up to get the chemo. On Friday they changed their mind. I went home for the weekend. We were back at the CTCA on Monday all prepared to get some radiation, I know what a change! So turns out that someone broke the machine, we had to wait on a part. Monday wasted, however they did try to call and tell us not to come, but we were already in the car on the way over. Tuesday, things get started, Wednesday radiated. On Friday (yesterday) there was a question as to whether chemo could happen, the radiologist had suggested a week in between radiation and chemo, Craig spoke to the oncologist and it was a go, yay! I wanted to get started. My mom and I went out yesterday for the chemo. We also have to meet with a doctors assistant who I do not like. Unfortuneately we will have to meet with her every time there is a direct chemo (that means chemo without seeing the doctor first). This is the second time that she has made comments that I have not appreciated. Such as, her first comment upon seeing me was " I know you are not here for chemo." Well we were on the infustion floor, and they were at the time taking my blood, so pretty much there for the chemo. Who wouldn't want chemo?! She was still under the impression that I was still on a week lull, which is fine I know her job is to make sure that I am safe, however to question me in such a way, and then also to not say hello or anything else, wow, she is on my list. She has also questioned my choice of homeopathic doctor telling me that he is not qualified to take care of the cancer issue. So I think we will probably be friends. :)

Anyway my favorite part of the whole thing, was that I had called Craig to see exactly what had happened with the oncologist and where these wires might have gotten crossed. I was on the phone with him when the doctor's assistant came over to give us the news that there was not going to be any chemo today. I had laid the phone down and Craig could hear everything, but then he yelled into the phone that he wanted to talk to her. It was so funny to me because he was at his desk at work and he was yelling to talk to her. It actually was a good talk because there was much that happened and a lot of disrespect of our time and such.

Like I said much happened this is not even half of it. I still like CTCA, but this week has not been their typical care. I got quality attention and care, however the schedule and such total mess.

I am looking forward to getting into a routine, and the chemo and getting this thing finally kicked in the butt. :)

The Results Are In!

I know you all have been most anxiously waiting for the conclusion of the follow-up doctor's appointment. So here we are. Remember how I told you all Craig tried to prepare me for a maybe not so awesome response? Well he was unfortunately right. It turns out that the drug I was on failed, and there was proof to show that. That means, new drugs and a new protocol. I will be on a 2 kinds of chemotherapy drugs, some sort of new hormone thing I have never been on, and 2 other drugs that I have been consistently on. Doesn't that sound fun!? That is a lot of drugs. Wow. It will be good though because one of the chemo drugs is a derivative of a chemo drug I was on before which was awesome. I am much more comfortable with this therapy. This will be a little bit harder protocol though because I will be out getting chemo every Friday. We'll deal. The first treatment in the new protocol is Friday the 15th next week. The oncologist did not give chemo yesterday because he likes to break the chemo cycles when he is changing it. I was already overdue for another chemo so that is probably the fastest to get it. I super want it. I am ready to get the better drugs and get this thing going. The whole drug side effects will be pretty much the same except for I will probably lose all my hair so I will probably be getting a chemo cut this week. It is just so messy to try to save any of it and it is depressing when you get handfuls of hair. A new thing that I have never experienced that people get is a sort of rash on your face that resembles acne. How awesome is that to have in your 30s? :) Apparently if you get this rash it is an indicator the chemo is doing a good job for you, so I expect to get it. At the CTCA they called it the "war rash" which totally cracked me up. As for the procedure, not happening yet. We are going to do a little chemo and see if it is necessary, I bet it will be because I am super lucky that way. Anyway, they can do this thing a bunch of times and that is what I am hoping to avoid. It is actually a short procedure, so it is almost in my comfort zone, but I will do what I have to.

So that's the news. Not what I had hoped to report, but such is the way of the whole cancer treatment at times. This is the only time a drug has failed me in 4 years so that's pretty good.

I think I may go shopping for new hats today. :) Especially winter hats, it is super cold out when you have a bald head!

Heavenly Appointment?

I neglected to mention that I actually had an appointment conflict on Friday. I had an appointment with my homeopathic doctor, it has been scheduled for something ridiculous like 6 months. These appointments are super sought after, and I feel it is very important for me to go for a number of reasons, but I haven't gone into a lot of detail about him here. Anyway, I was super upset when I found out I had double booked the appointments, I had even thought about rescheduling the chemotherapy appointments because I had really wanted to go to this appointment if that tell you anything, I considered the appointment with him as important as the chemo. I feared that if I canceled it would take months before I could get an appointment again. I had tried to call him last week so that there would be as much time as possible to maybe reschedule before the appointment on Friday. They were closed for the holiday which I don't blame them for at all. Today when I was finally able to get through, they were able to reschedule me for 1/13 which is a better appointment because I will be able to discuss all of what the oncologist has said and go over the PET scan with him.

Always, always, always, I feel like Jesus has been in charge of my cancer treatment. Whenever I have needed something, he has made an opportunity or brought an issue to light. This is just another one of those times. It makes me so excited because this is a way I have been able to connect more personally with Jesus and it has strengthened my faith by having these benchmarks to look back at and know he is orchestrating things I need in my life. I also feel like perhaps this is his true agenda to show me Himself and strengthen my faith while healing cancer. This is the amazing part to me, and it is hard to communicate this part of the cancer journey, the spiritual part so hopefully this makes some sense.

A Healthy 2010

I remember the beginning of 2009, I was thinking finally the year that ends the cancer. I have a tendency to think that each year, and that is what I am thinking this year. Last year started with the cancer just being blown up and great oncology plans which all came to pass, then the goofball cancer did it's regular thing and revved all up again. The end of 2009, certainly is going the same way, there have been a few bumps, with the sinus infection, and extra scans, but still the chemo was doing it's job at the last PET scan, and fast too. You have to love that response and it keeps me all positive for more chemo and gettin' 'er done.

So now this week, I feel like is a key moment, January 7-8, it is scan time, I should receive the 5th treatment in a series of 6 chemos. In this appointment, we get to talk to the oncologist (finally), a PET scan, and then we get to consult with some other team for a possible procedure, I will share that if it comes to pass otherwise just know I HATE to be poked and prodded, and under anesthetic.

My hope and prayer for the coming days is for an AWESOME PET scan. Craig has tried to prepare me for a not super awesome response because I had to wait for more chemo with the sinus infection, and even this next appointment has been delayed a week because of the holidays, and his thought is waiting may not have provided as much response as usual. We'll see. I still have high expectations. This is a pivotal point because most likely it will decide if there will be another 6 chemos, if I have to have a procedure, and there is a really important question to answer which is what is the care going to be when this PET scan is squeaky clean. Lots of stuff. I hope for good answers and continued health blessings. If you pray, I would love it if you thought of me this week.